31 for 21: Day 28...The Surprises Continue

As a Facebook addict, I constantly read my friends' updates.  I am particularly interested in experiences with doctors.  Andrew is relatively healthy with no major medical problems.  He is also rarely sick besides allergies.  I eagerly read about traumatic visits to doctors and specialists so I know that I am not alone in my experiences.  Because of Andrew's good health, his lack of visits to doctors' offices leads to major issues when we do have to go.  ENT visits are especially traumatizing.  I'm not sure if it's worse for me or for Andrew.  My heart breaks every time I see him freaking out at our doctor visits.  I also spend a lot of time chasing him around the office because he manages to escape from the exam rooms.  Because of this, I was already preparing to be traumatized today when I took Andrew for his semi-annual dentist visit.

Visualize the dentist's office...a large size waiting room full of baskets of toys to be knocked over, a bathroom with a door that Andrew can open so he can "practice" flushing the toilet, and an exam station which has 3 areas all open with no doors to keep kids in.  I've been there with him before, and I brought Hailey in a stroller and my mother to help me maintain control.  The last visit was easier than the first two visits.  Andrew would at least sit in my lap and let the hygienist look into his mouth and she actually got to clean his teeth.  It was going okay...well, that is until the dentist came in to take a look at Andrew's mouth.  Andrew seems to really have a problem with male authority figures, or at least those who are trying to get Andrew to behave or perform in a certain way.  Doctors, teachers, photographers...if they are men, forget it.  Andrew just starts crying when they ask him to do something.  The dentist was no exception even though the visit had been successful until that point.  Andrew refused to cooperate and clung to me until we left the office.

For the third day in a row, Andrew has managed to surprise me.  He climbed into the dentist's chair and looked around like he was the King of the dentist's office.  He even let the hygienist raise and lower the chair.  He didn't start climbing out until she tried to lower the headrest.  He decided then that he wanted to sit with me, so I sat in the chair with him on my lap and we both went for a ride on the dentist's chair.  He noticed that SpongeBob Squarepants sticker on her name tag and pointed it out to her.  That led to our conversation about Andrew's SpongeBob Halloween costume and the Halloween party at school that morning.  He was really excited trying to get out the words to talk to her.  When he was done with that conversation, I leaned him back against me and he started to relax.  The hygienist was able to scrape his teeth, clean them and floss as well.  He practically fell asleep while she was working.  Now, I don't mind the dentist at all, but I really don't think that I would ever be able to fall asleep while the hygienist was working in my mouth. 

After she was done, Andrew started to hop out of the chair, but she was able to distract him by having him show her how he brushes his teeth at home.  And then...in walks the dentist.  Andrew looked at him, trying to figure out what he wanted with him.  As he looked him over, Andrew noticed the "Nemo" embroidered on his jacket.  He called out, "Meno, Meno" which is how he pronounces it.  Instantly, Andrew figured out that this dentist must be a cool guy if he had Nemo on his jacket.  Andrew then settled back against me in the chair and opened his mouth for the dentist.  He waited patiently while the dentist looked at all of his teeth, gave notes to the hygienist about his teeth, and had the fluoride brushed on his teeth.  The other hygienists in the room almost had no idea that there was a patient in the office, Andrew was that quiet.  They all came by remarking on that cute and composed boy in the corner area.

Andrew surprised me once again, and I was able to almost enjoy the dentist visit and ask all of my questions while we were there, instead of having to call the doctor later that day to get my questions answered after rushing Andrew out the door so he would stop crying.  I didn't even have to bribe him with the coins that I put in my pocket or district him with his flash card app on my phone. My little boy is growing up and realizing that not every doctor visit needs to be a traumatic experience.  I was so proud of him today and I made sure to tell everyone what a good boy he was at the dentist.  He proudly showed off his clean teeth to both of his grandmothers, his sister, the woman that worked for us today, and his daddy.  We also took a picture of his smile for daddy to take to his Pop-Pop in the hospital so he could see them too!

31 for 21: Day 2...At the Pediatrician

I remember a trip to the pediatrician after Hailey was born for a well visit.  After her exam and vaccinations, we discussed Andrew's progress at the time.  Although I will never remember how old either of my kids were at the time, I will never forget what their doctor said to me at that visit.



Andrew in the recovery room with me.

 As we talked about Andrew and his progress in Birth to Three, I remember saying something about being so happy with Andrew's progress and how hard we were both working to help him become successful in meeting his next milestone.  Dr. Sude, the kids' pediatrician told me that she remembers discussing me with the two other doctors in the practice shortly after Andrew was born.  Dr. Sude was the first of the doctors in the practice that came to visit us in the hospital the afternoon that Andrew was born.  I had already been notified of the hospital pediatrician's suspected diagnosis of Down syndrome.  She told me that she was so impressed with the way I was handling Andrew's diagnosis and my positive outlook of a potentially devastating time of my life.  I know that many families are devastated when they learn their newborn has Down syndrome.  At the time, I didn't consider myself more knowledgeable about Down syndrome than any other parent who receives the diagnosis post-natally.  She remembers how thrilled I was...Andrew is my first child, the boy that I always wanted and named after my beloved grandfather.  His diagnosis was secondary to me.  I knew that there would be time for research and time for reflection.  But, most importantly to me, she remembers that I told her that I was chosen to be Andrew's mother and there was a reason that he was chosen just for me.  And although I wasn't sure why I was chosen, I knew that someday during our journey together, I would come to realize why Andrew was sent to me.

As I remember my time in the hospital with Andrew, I remember how much love I felt for my little, fragile son on that morning that he was born.  I remember calling my mother with the wonderful news that her first grandson was born and the concerned, yet confident tone in her voice when she told me that everything would be all right and everyone will love Andrew, regardless of his diagnosis.  But most of all, I remember meeting Dr. Sude for the first time that afternoon and sensing her understanding of my philosophy of Andrew's birth.